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Parenting in the Middle Years: Wisdom and Wonders

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Parenting is a journey that constantly evolves as our children grow and change. As they enter the middle years, between childhood and adolescence, we find ourselves navigating new challenges and embracing the wonders of this unique phase. It’s a time of transition, where we witness their increasing independence, while still providing guidance and support. In this article, we’ll explore valuable insights from multiple sources to help you navigate parenting in the middle years with wisdom and grace.

Embracing the Seasons of Parenting

The middle years of parenting bring about a range of emotions as we watch our children transition from one stage to another. In the article “Enjoying the Seasons of Parenting” by Tracie Miles, she shares her experience of the bittersweet moments of seeing her children grow up quickly. As her daughters prepared to leave for college, Tracie reflected on the changing seasons of life and the importance of treasuring each moment with our children. She reminds us of the wisdom found in the book of Ecclesiastes, where it states that there is a season for every activity under heaven.

“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.”

– Ecclesiastes 3:1 (NLT) –

Tracie’s reflection reminds us to embrace the current season of parenting rather than mourning the ones that have passed. Every moment with our children is a blessing, and by treasuring each season, we can find peace and joy in our hearts.

The Importance of Emotional Resilience

Parenting in the middle years requires emotional resilience. In the article “Growing in Wisdom as a Parent” by Sherry Surratt, she emphasizes the importance of emotional resilience in navigating the challenges of parenting. Sherry acknowledges that parenting older children is more complicated and unsettling compared to parenting young children. The issues become harder, the stakes higher, and emotions and eye rolls become more prevalent. However, she encourages parents to remain resilient and rely on God’s wisdom to guide them through this phase.

“If any of you needs wisdom, you should ask God for it. He will give it to you. God gives freely to everyone and doesn’t find fault.”

– James 1:5 (NIRV) –

Sherry’s words remind us that we can seek wisdom from God to navigate the complexities of parenting in the middle years. By relying on His guidance and remaining emotionally resilient, we can face the challenges with grace and love.

Building Cross-Generational Relationships

As our children grow older, it becomes essential to foster cross-generational relationships. In the article “What the Middle Years of Parenting Need Most” by Suburban Shalom, the author highlights the significance of investing in the teenagers and young people around us. In today’s social media-driven culture, where young people are heavily influenced by influencers and the desire for fame, it is crucial to counteract these influences with meaningful relationships.

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The author suggests that parents and other mature adults can play a vital role in guiding and supporting young people through the middle years. By becoming mentors and investing in their lives, we can help them navigate this phase and discover their true potential. These cross-generational relationships provide love, encouragement, and a sense of belonging that can make a significant difference in a young person’s life.

Applying Toltec Wisdom to Parenting Teens

Parenting teenagers requires a unique set of skills and strategies. In the article “How to Apply Toltec Wisdom to Parenting Teens” by Creations of a Patchwork Momma, the author shares insights from Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, “The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom.” These principles can be adapted and applied to parenting teenagers in a meaningful way.

Be Impeccable with Your Word

The first agreement, “Be Impeccable with Your Word,” emphasizes the power of our words and the importance of using them to spread positivity and love. The author encourages us to model this behavior for our teenagers, reminding them that what they say matters. Gossip and negative communication can spread emotional poison, while love and positivity can create beauty and harmony.

Don’t Take Anything Personally

The second agreement, “Don’t Take Anything Personally,” reminds us not to internalize the words and actions of our teenagers. It acknowledges that their behavior is a reflection of their own feelings, beliefs, and opinions, and not necessarily a personal attack on us as parents. By not taking things personally, we can maintain our emotional well-being and respond to our teenagers with empathy and understanding.

Don’t Make Assumptions

The third agreement, “Don’t Make Assumptions,” emphasizes the importance of clear communication. The author reminds us that assumptions can lead to misunderstandings and conflict, and encourages us to seek clarity by asking questions and expressing our expectations openly. By practicing clear communication, we can build stronger relationships with our teenagers and minimize misunderstandings.

Always Do Your Best

The fourth agreement, “Always Do Your Best,” encourages us to practice the first three agreements to the best of our abilities. Parenting is a journey of growth and learning, and we must strive to do our best in each moment. Our best may vary from day to day, but by consistently applying these principles, we can create a positive and loving environment for our teenagers to thrive.

Nurturing Individuality and Independence

During the middle years, our children begin to assert their individuality and seek greater independence. In the reference articles, there is a common theme of embracing this growth while providing guidance and support.

Tracie Miles emphasizes the importance of treasuring each season of parenting, including the transition to independence. As our children pursue their dreams and embark on new adventures, we can celebrate their growth and support their endeavors.

Sherry Surratt encourages parents to remain resilient and adaptable as their children navigate the challenges of the middle years. It’s essential to strike a balance between offering guidance and allowing space for independence. By doing so, we can nurture their individuality while providing a safe and supportive environment.

The author of Suburban Shalom recognizes the need for cross-generational relationships during this phase. As our children seek to define themselves and form their identities, connecting them with mentors and supportive adults can provide valuable guidance and perspective.

Communication and Connection

Effective communication is crucial during the middle years of parenting. Our children are developing their own thoughts, feelings, and opinions, and it’s important to create an environment where they feel heard and understood.

Tracie Miles reminds us of the power of prayer and seeking wisdom from God. By maintaining open lines of communication with our children and with God, we can navigate the challenges and uncertainties of parenting with grace and love.

Sherry Surratt emphasizes the importance of clear communication and understanding our children’s unique needs. As they transition into adolescence, their communication styles may change, and it’s crucial to adapt and listen actively. By fostering open and honest communication, we can strengthen our relationship with our children.

The author of Creations of a Patchwork Momma highlights the significance of being impeccable with our words and modeling positive communication for our teenagers. By avoiding gossip, spreading love, and avoiding assumptions, we can foster healthy communication patterns in our families.


Parenting in the middle years is a time of transition, growth, and wonder. It requires emotional resilience, cross-generational relationships, and effective communication. By embracing the seasons of parenting, nurturing individuality and independence, and applying wisdom from multiple sources, we can navigate this phase with grace and love. Remember to be present, cherish each moment, and seek guidance from God as we guide our children through the wonders of the middle years.

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